Elder Abuse - American Psychological Association - elizabeth's actions (2)

(Note:  While Elizabeth was still in Ohio and mother was bedridden, she would often call and tell the caregiver to hold the phone up next to her mother's ear so she could talk to her.  Then, she would tell mother that she was going to move her to Ohio.  Mother would become extremely upset and start crying.  This happened over and over again.)  

(Note: Elizabeth would hold mother's hand and forecfully smack her arm while she was talking to her.  It was so bad at one point that the caregiver called the sheriff's office to report Elizabeth's violent behavior and was told, "We were told not to respond to calls from caregivers at this address.")

(Note: Our neighbor heard Daddy screaming "She's trying to kill me!" and came running.  Daddy had long since forgotten how things worked and was on a walker.  Nonetheless, Elizabeth decided that he should mow the yard on the riding mower.  She had put him on it and started it for him.  He had become confused and had driven it up underneath the back deck.  He had gotten stuck and his whole body and mower was jammed so tight that the mower would not move anymore even though he still had his foot on the gas.  Elizabeth was standing near the deck watching when our neighbor arrived and ran up underneath the deck.  One of the caregivers ran out of the house and helped the neighbor get him out from where he was wedged.  Daddy refused to go to the hospital, but shortly afterwards he ended up in the hospital with a staph infection from injuries and eventually was transferred to a nursing home for care.) 

(Note: Daddy's neurologist told Daddy and Elizabeth that under no circumstances should Daddy drive again.  We did not learn this until many months later.  Elizabeth continued to allow Daddy to drive.  Barbara, who was the court appointed guardian/conservator of mother at this time, did not renw the insurance or tag on the car which was in mother's name.  Daddy kept driving.  I purchased a boot and had it put on the steering wheel.  Daddy called the man who did little favors for him in return for 17 acres of free hay (Steve Pennnington) to come over and cut off the boot.  It ended up on my doorstep the next morning.  Barbara then had a state trooper come talk to Daddy about not driving anymore, and he said the wouldn't.  Shortly after that Elizabeth bought a van (her name but mother and daddy's money) and gave Daddy the keys.  Within 24 hours, Daddy had driven the van through the back of the garage, through the back room of the house, and off the deck.  The neighbor heard the commotion and came running.  Daddy was making donuts around the barn.  His foot was stuck on the gas and he could not figure out how to get it off.  The neighbor ran alongside the van, snatched open the door and pulled Daddy to safety.  Elizabeth had the van repaired and brought back.  Daddy still had the keys.)

(Note: Mother was on oxygen 24/7 plus oxygen treatment every 2 hours.  Her lungs would not expel.  Barbara received a frantic phone call from the caregiver at the time.  She said that Elizabeth had ordered her to take mother out to get some fresh air and park her on the porch under the pear tree while Daddy mowed the yard.  Everything was in full bloom, the air was thick with pollen, and mother was having difficulty breathing even in the house.  To have moved her outdoors under the pear tree at this critical juncture could have been lethal for her.   Barbara -the guardian at the time-told the caregiver absolutely not.)

(Note: Mother was past walking and talking.  Elizabeth had come down from Ohio for a visit.  While the caregiver was in the bathtub, Elizabeth attempted to move mother and "accidentally" dropped her.  She left her on the floor without telling the caregiver until the caregiver came into the room sometime later and found mother curled up on the floor.  Elizabeth went back to Ohio and the caregiver did not tell Barbara or me what happened.  Barbara was there a couple of hours later and mother had her eyes closed and was very quiet.  The next morning when Barbara noticed that mother was moaning and crying, she querried the caregiver who told Barbara what  had happened.  Barbara called the ambulance to take her to the hospital.  X-rays revealed no broken bones, but contusions around the hips and pelvic area  -which may or may not have happened as a result of the fall.  As a side note, the 5-day-a-week caregiver was TERRIFIED of Elizabeth and frozen with fear when Elizabeth and Daddy were together.  As mother has said a thousand times, referring to Elizabeth and Daddy, "I can't fight both of them.")

(Note: Remy called Barbara and told her that Elizabeth had defiantly taken mother to WalMart (without Barbar's permission).  This resulted in a major medical setback for Mother.  She ended up on antibiotics for 18 days.)  She also took her to get ice cream (windows down in the car, air blowing in mother's face).  They were gone for 3 hours.  Mother ended up coughing and congested,  which rolled right into a diagnosis of congestive heart failure.  She never recovered from that setback and began a slow decline in health from that point until her death.)

Emotional or psychological abuse can range from name-calling or giving
the "silent treatment" to intimidating and threatening the individual.
When a family member, a caregiver, or other person behaves in a way
that causes fear, mental anguish, and emotional pain or distress, the
behavior can be regarded as abusive. Emotional and psychological abuse
can include insults and threats. It can also include treating the
older person like a child and isolating the person from family,
friends, and regular activities-either by force or threats or through